Living with Integrity & Finding Balance

Living with Integrity & Finding Balance

By Paul Fetters

At a very young age my dad taught me what it means to make a commitment and stick to it. He was the most committed person I’d ever met, if he said he would be somewhere you just knew he would be there. His friends and coworkers used to say, “You know if Bob said he would do it, it would get done.” It was said as such a great compliment.

I remember thinking to myself as an impressionable child; “I want people to say that about me!” I would speak to my dad about it, I remember it vividly. He said, “It starts with following through with commitments you make to yourself.” He told me that in order for you to be someone people can count on, you have to be true to commitments you make to yourself first.

He explained to me, if you can’t follow through with your own commitments how could you be counted on to be there for others?
It starts with little things as a child – make your bed, eat breakfast, do your homework, do what you say you are going to do even if no one else is watching.

I can honestly say that every time I made a commitment to compete in bodybuilding at one point or another I wanted to quit, but I never did. I would remember what my dad said to me. “Every time you make a commitment to yourself, you need to keep it!” I always did, and it served me well in other parts of my life.

How good are you at keeping your word? Many of us try very hard to keep our commitments to others. We try to call if we say we will. We make every effort to show up when others are counting on us. We try to get projects done on time. We don’t promise things we can’t deliver.

We want our word to be worth something. That’s part of living with integrity.Unfortunately, many of us are not quite as good at keeping our commitments to ourselves. How many times have you said, “I’m going to. . .” only to have that intention fall away? “I’m going to slow down, I’m going to lose weight, I’m going to get my life in order, I’m going to exercise regularly, I’m going to watch less T.V. and spend more time reading, I’m going to get to bed at a decent hour.” Sound familiar?

Do we really mean what we are saying? If so, we need to make a COMMITMENT to follow through on the things we are promising ourselves in just the same way that we would if we were making those promises to someone else.

Ultimately, it ends up all coming back to your word. How much is your word worth? If you can’t honor your commitments to yourself and/or others, your life is likely to feel out of control and out of balance due to not living with integrity.

If you are good at honoring your commitments to others, but don’t do as well at honoring commitments to yourself, look at this issue honestly. Your commitment to yourself is every bit as important as your commitment to others. Make that commitment to yourself count first.

At The Training Spot we are committed to helping you reach your goals.Paul and Carolyn Fetters own two Training Spot Gyms and AMS Nutrition centers, both located in Huntington Beach. The Training Spot 16942 Gothard St. and The Training Spot 440 Main St. Paul is certified through the State of CA to speak in Nutrition, Fitness and Wellness. He regularly speaks to several Police and City Agencies throughout OC. For more info, please call (714) 841-9294 or (714) 374-7448 or visit

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